I love shopping at the 99 ¢ Only Store, mainly because the place is graveyard for some of the most terrible products ever created. For example, today I found Steven Seagal's Lightning Bolt. That's right, it's an energy drink emblazoned with the visage of that perpetually scowling "action star", Steven Seagal.

It comes in two flavors: Asian Experience and Cherry Charge. I have no idea why the flavor in the blue can is called Asian Experience, but if that's what Asia tastes like, I'm never going there.

I bought both flavors for $0.59 a can. All morning, I was teasing the kids by saying, "Does anybody want a Steven Seagal energy drink. My girlfriend's 15 year old son finally took me up on it. The look on his face after one sip told the whole story: Steven Seagal tastes terrible.

I took a little swig myself, and I have to say, it's probably the worst swill I've ever tasted. I can't even describe it. The boy said he would finish the can if I paid him $5.00 to do it. I was tempted, but seriously, I just couldn't do that to the kid.

We still have a can of the Cherry drink. I'm thinking about tossing it in the trash, but I'd feel guilty about improperly disposing of hazardous waste. Really, it's that bad.